Bond, James Bond: Lazenby and Connery (again)

When Connery decided not to come back as Bond, George Lazenby was picked to take over the role. He was a model with no prior acting experience, and it shows. All I could think when watching “On Her Majesty’s Secret Service” was “this is like Temu James Bond.” Temu, for the uninformed, is a Chinese company that sells cheap versions of stuff-as a teacher, 90 percent of the stickers and prizes I give my students are from Temu. The entire movie felt like a knock-off Bond movie.

And then I looked on Letterboxd, and apparently I am wrong about this movie. People seem to like this one a lot and consider it one of the strongest of the series. I don’t know what I am missing. I was so incredibly bored-I get that they were trying for a more grounded Bond and a realistic story, but nothing in this movie worked for me. “Casino Royale,” Daniel Craig’s first Bond, also did this, but the movie was infinitely more compelling. I don’t think Lazenby is a good Bond. He doesn’t have the charm and charisma that Connery and, quite frankly, every other Bond has. They try to frame him as cool in the opening sequence where we do not see his face, but it doesn’t work, and when you have him look at the camera and deliver the line “This never happened to the other fellow,” it's just a reminder that this is a lesser Bond.

There are two chase sequences down a mountain on skis that are even more boring than the underwater scenes in “Thunderball.” The final fight between Bond and Telly Savalas’ Blofeld takes place in a bobsled. In theory, these could be cool sequences, but the way they were executed was unexciting. I really don’t know what I was missing when I watched this, but I hated it.

When Lazenby decided not to return as Bond, despite testing other actors for the role, the studio wanted Connery back and backed up the Brinks truck to get him (a record $1.25 million at the time). After hating the previous movie, this one was a welcome return. It would be impossible not to know that Connery was back, considering he was in the trailer, but I couldn’t help think about what it would have been like not to know he was back. The opening of the movie does a lot to keep his face obscured (kinda like they did for Lazenby) until he utters that famous line, “My name is Bond, James Bond.” If there had been cell phone cameras and internet back in 1971, there would have been videos circulating of people cheering when he appeared.

The thing about the Bond series is that there are so few great ones (Goldfinger, Goldeneye, Casino Royale, and Skyfall), a handful of good/fine ones, and more than a fair share of bad ones. It really depends on how much you tolerate certain elements of the series. For instance, I am good with some gadgets, but the more silly ones that get used, the less I like the movie (to preview my thoughts on the Roger Moore films which I am about halfway through).

Next Time: Roger Moore